Friday, August 20, 2004

Bridesmaiding it.

I am going to be a bridesmaid this weekend.

Here is what I've been reminding myself of all week:

1) Do not forget the groom's name AGAIN. It's bad to be standing up and witnessing vows when you're thinking, "Katie's marrying WHO? Bob? Rob? ZACH!"

2) Daydreaming that I'm marrying Zach Braff may be a good time killer at the altar.

3) Do not rip the wedding to shreds by detailing in my head what I would have done differently had I planned the wedding. Occupational hazaard.

4) Do not focus on the fact that I'll be the oldest bridesmaid in the line-up. Be proud that I just turned 35 and try not to shoot the stank eye at the other 25 year-olds.

5) Try to remember that the highlight of the experience will NOT be the flowing champagne while we get ready. But really? Weeeeeeee!

6) Limit myself to two glasses of champagne while getting ready. No bride wants that fucked-up bridesmaid who gets all shitfaced and can't even make it down the aisle.

7) Remember to call Valerie to remind her of how fucked up she was when she was in my own wedding nearly ten years ago. BEFORE the wedding even started. It's funny NOW.

8) Work on pose for wedding pictures. Try to find happy medium between eyes closed and deer-in-headlights.

9) Try not to scream in horror if they play Bob Seger's "Old Time Rock and Roll".